![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
August 20th, 2007
August 15th, 2007
"What if the best that I can be just isn't good enough?
Isn't it better not to know?"
-Coulton
August 4th, 2007
I love walikng up to Austrians and just saying "Hey! You might be related to Hitler!" I also enjoy being hanged, shot, or gassed.
July 22nd, 2007
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I am going to kill Livejournal. I shall smite it with the fury of a thousand tiny fists, and it shall complain of a slight headache before realizing it actually has a tumor the size -and approximate shape- of a sumo-wrestler. And then, I shall kidnap Wayne Coyne and make him my mistress. For I had written quite a lengthy text extolling the numerous virtues of the awesome Flaming Lips, but alas, my finger slipped, and I did end up on the site of some crap or other, and I did wail howwibly howwibly as the "restored draft" turned out to not be my meticulously crafted piece of propaganda, but rather three words of no importance, obviously written whilst inebriated. So, fuck. Here's a picture of my beloved:
Is he not adorable? Verily I say unto thee, he is like, totally, like, hot, you know.
And here's a video. Unless LJ decides to be a bitch and do the same thing it did last time, in which case it is at the beginning of the entry.
Yeah. Bitch.
Oh, I'm back in Iceland, for exactly the amount of time it takes to get enough money to go back to Amsterdam. Everybody was nice, especially my two hosts, Anne-Marie and Keith, on one of which I had a wee crushie. One of them looks like Dustin Hoffman and sounds like Mark Steel, rides a Suzuki Somethingorother, and the other is a very nice girl who shares my taste in music and books. Guess which one I had to go all giggly over. Sometimes I think my taste is hopeless. Most of the time I'm glad for it, since it translates to less sharing.
Ah, the wonderful world of incoherent rambling!
blankJune 22nd, 2007
Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97... wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.
I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are NOT as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
inspiredJune 18th, 2007
<div align="center"> <table style="color: black; background: #eeeeee" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <tr> <td bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <div align="center">Advanced Global Personality Test Results<br> <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="4" bgcolor="#eeeeee"><tr> <td> <table style="color: black; background: #dddddd" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <tr> <td><a href="http://similarminds.com/types/extraversi
crankyJune 13th, 2007
Is it just me, or is there something fundamentally creepy about laughing babies? I mean really laughing, not just giggling. Like that creepy YouTube video. It's not cute, it's not adorable, it's not even funny. It's. Just. Creepy. What's wrong with you people!
creeped outJune 12th, 2007
This blog, that is.
Anyway, here's yet another pointless list. This time, I think I'll list...oh, say, things that make me happy. Let's make it a top ten.
10. Cheese
Ever since I was a kid, I've loved cheese, especially melted cheese. After I reached teenagehood, and subsequently acquired the cold, hard cash required to purchase said dairy products, I've gained a new appreciation for various kinds of curdled mammal juice. Thus far my favourite cheese is a lovely truffle-brie, which effectively combines one of the most expensive foods in Iceland (foreign dairy products) and one of the most expensive foods in the world (french truffles). Aside from that, I enjoy all sorts of cheese, from Philadelphia cream cheese to brie to blue cheese. The one kind of cheese I don't really want to try (though I probably would if I had the chance), is casu marzu.
9. Altering clothes
I just love finding clothes that inspire me. Whether it's a shirt that makes a cool top or a bit of leftover curtains turned into a snazzy skirt. Unfortunately I've never really learned to sew, so my mom alters them for me. I design them though....
8. A blank slate
There's really nothing morer inspiring to me than a new notebook/blog/sketch pad. Which is probably the reason I have seven blogs so far. I'm trying to break the (very expensive) habit of constantly buying new books, but it's not working too well so far. Well, it's the best cure for writer's block I know.
7. Beer
Now, I know what you're thinking. Why would I put beer in seventh place? Well, I ran out of ideas, because I'm drinking beer. But beer does make me happy, but not just in that drunken-happiness kind of way. I love discovering new beers, which is one of the reasons I'm looking forward to my trip. Hello, Belgium!
5. Cooking
I love cooking. Especially when it turns out great. Which (oh, I'm so modest) it often does. I love experimenting with food, and -in my humble opinion- is one of the things that make a good cook. I love mixing oils, and for your benefit I shall include one of my favourites;
A lot of vegetable oil.
Dried paprika.
Ground white pepper.
Ground coriander seeds.
Garlic powder.
Onion powder.
So, you'll want an approximate ratio of 1 part paprika to 1/2 pepper, 1/2 coriander, 1/8 garlic, 1/8 onion powder to 6 - 6 1/2 parts oil. Mix all the ingredients, and then microwave it (ot heat it in a small saucepan), and let it cool. The nice thing about this recipe is that you can re-use the spices several times by replenishing the oil each time you use some.
4. Slash
Not the wild-haired guitar player, but rather the genre. For those not familiar with the term, you suck. Slash is a sub-genre of fanfiction, usually including some sort of homosexual relationship. My primary ships (slang for "relationships") are Harry/Snape, J.D./Dr.Cox, Shawn/Lassiter and Wilson/House. My secondary ships are Snape/Sirius, Snape/Remus, and Ben/Dr.Cox. Judge me if you will.
3. Cats
I. Love. Cats. I have three, and I can't pass one in the street without pursuing it for a while in hope of a petting (that is, that I get to pet the cat, not the other way around). The best (and worst, since they were all strays) part of going to Marmaris was the cats. I'd buy them kebab chicken, and they'd follow me around. So, when I grow up, I'm gonna open a cat shelter. How can people not love cats? I've never understood that.
2. Trivia
Well, knowledge in general, but especially obscure knowledge. I get all giggly picking up new information, and I am the champion of Trivial Pursuit. I love QI (although I'd probably suck at it, since I'm better at trivia than being interesting), and I love correcting people.
Aaaaaaaaaaand....the #1 thing that makes my heart do cartwheels and my brain go all giggly iiiiiiissssss.....
1. Fucking with people!
Yes, I love making other people's brains go "Whu!?"
I like dressing up as a punk and giving old ladies my seat on the bus. I like acting all tough whilst listening to classical music. I love subverting people's expectations. There's really nothing like it. Besides, I like to think that my little mind-fucking experiments help break down the barriers of prejudice.
Ohm and before you start thinking of me as some sort of activist, let me mention that I also do it the other way around, dressing all fancy-schmancy whilst acting incredibly uncouth.
There are a few other things that make me happy, but these are the ones I could think of right now.
Anyway, here's yet another pointless list. This time, I think I'll list...oh, say, things that make me happy. Let's make it a top ten.
10. Cheese
Ever since I was a kid, I've loved cheese, especially melted cheese. After I reached teenagehood, and subsequently acquired the cold, hard cash required to purchase said dairy products, I've gained a new appreciation for various kinds of curdled mammal juice. Thus far my favourite cheese is a lovely truffle-brie, which effectively combines one of the most expensive foods in Iceland (foreign dairy products) and one of the most expensive foods in the world (french truffles). Aside from that, I enjoy all sorts of cheese, from Philadelphia cream cheese to brie to blue cheese. The one kind of cheese I don't really want to try (though I probably would if I had the chance), is casu marzu.
9. Altering clothes
I just love finding clothes that inspire me. Whether it's a shirt that makes a cool top or a bit of leftover curtains turned into a snazzy skirt. Unfortunately I've never really learned to sew, so my mom alters them for me. I design them though....
8. A blank slate
There's really nothing morer inspiring to me than a new notebook/blog/sketch pad. Which is probably the reason I have seven blogs so far. I'm trying to break the (very expensive) habit of constantly buying new books, but it's not working too well so far. Well, it's the best cure for writer's block I know.
7. Beer
Now, I know what you're thinking. Why would I put beer in seventh place? Well, I ran out of ideas, because I'm drinking beer. But beer does make me happy, but not just in that drunken-happiness kind of way. I love discovering new beers, which is one of the reasons I'm looking forward to my trip. Hello, Belgium!
5. Cooking
I love cooking. Especially when it turns out great. Which (oh, I'm so modest) it often does. I love experimenting with food, and -in my humble opinion- is one of the things that make a good cook. I love mixing oils, and for your benefit I shall include one of my favourites;
A lot of vegetable oil.
Dried paprika.
Ground white pepper.
Ground coriander seeds.
Garlic powder.
Onion powder.
So, you'll want an approximate ratio of 1 part paprika to 1/2 pepper, 1/2 coriander, 1/8 garlic, 1/8 onion powder to 6 - 6 1/2 parts oil. Mix all the ingredients, and then microwave it (ot heat it in a small saucepan), and let it cool. The nice thing about this recipe is that you can re-use the spices several times by replenishing the oil each time you use some.
4. Slash
Not the wild-haired guitar player, but rather the genre. For those not familiar with the term, you suck. Slash is a sub-genre of fanfiction, usually including some sort of homosexual relationship. My primary ships (slang for "relationships") are Harry/Snape, J.D./Dr.Cox, Shawn/Lassiter and Wilson/House. My secondary ships are Snape/Sirius, Snape/Remus, and Ben/Dr.Cox. Judge me if you will.
3. Cats
I. Love. Cats. I have three, and I can't pass one in the street without pursuing it for a while in hope of a petting (that is, that I get to pet the cat, not the other way around). The best (and worst, since they were all strays) part of going to Marmaris was the cats. I'd buy them kebab chicken, and they'd follow me around. So, when I grow up, I'm gonna open a cat shelter. How can people not love cats? I've never understood that.
2. Trivia
Well, knowledge in general, but especially obscure knowledge. I get all giggly picking up new information, and I am the champion of Trivial Pursuit. I love QI (although I'd probably suck at it, since I'm better at trivia than being interesting), and I love correcting people.
Aaaaaaaaaaand....the #1 thing that makes my heart do cartwheels and my brain go all giggly iiiiiiissssss.....
1. Fucking with people!
Yes, I love making other people's brains go "Whu!?"
I like dressing up as a punk and giving old ladies my seat on the bus. I like acting all tough whilst listening to classical music. I love subverting people's expectations. There's really nothing like it. Besides, I like to think that my little mind-fucking experiments help break down the barriers of prejudice.
Ohm and before you start thinking of me as some sort of activist, let me mention that I also do it the other way around, dressing all fancy-schmancy whilst acting incredibly uncouth.
There are a few other things that make me happy, but these are the ones I could think of right now.
June 10th, 2007
Or, rather, another pointless list. However, as this one is of the literary persuasion, I feel justified in referring to it as 'intellectual'. As well as using all them fancy words.
Here's a list of books that have influenced me in some way. In no particular order;
Zero Girl
by Sam Kieth
A comic book about high-school student Amy Smooter, who crushes on her guidance councellor, oozes blue goo from her feet when she feels shame, is protected by circles and attacked by squares, and saves the world. This book, recommended to me by a guidance-councellor-type-figure I had a terrible (and obvious) crush on, was the center of my world for a few months. The reason? Well, as Mr. Crush recommended it, he said it reminded him of me. I've often wondered if that was his idea of a cruel joke, since it caused me to read the book in record time, re-read it a few hundred times, and endlessly wallow over what he could possibly have meant. You'll forgive me my teenage angst if you read it.
Oh, and I occasionally use Zerogirl as an internet handle, and those eyes in my avatar are taken from the cover. Maybe it's time to let go...oh heck, I'll give it another seven years.
The Sexual State of the Union
by Susie Bright
I suppose you could say this is a study in cultural anthropology, or rather sexual anthropology, if there even is such a thing. I like this book so much, I may have...er...stolen it...from the library. But that's neither here nor there. My copy is now so battered, the library probably wouldn't take it back anyway. I've highlighted several passages, travelled to Denmark with it, accidentally spilled beer over it, and possibly used it to press leaves...from an illegal plant. This, however, says absolutely nothing about the book, so you'll just have to read it. I will include a short passage;
What is UP with sex lives of the people who love to say NO? Does the God Squad ever entertain impure thoughts? And if they do, how does it affect their politics?
The irony of questioning a conservative's sex life is that so many people think it's too damn rude to ask, while the crusading right wing makes it a point of principle to ask about everyone else's sex lives. Are you now or have you ever been a homosexual? Do you practice sodomy in the privacy of your own home? How old were you when you first had sex? How many people have you slept with? Which ones did you only lust after? Did you practice chastity as a teenager? Do you touch yourself in forbidden places? Why don't you have any children?
Bröderna Lejonhjärta (The Brothers Lionheart)
by Astrid Lindgren
The only book ever to come even close to making me believe in life after death, simply because it sounded like so much fun. If you're not familiar with this book, I'll give you the gist of the plot now:
The Brothers of the story are Karl and Jonatan Lejon (or Lion in the translation), 10 and 13 years old respectively. Karl is dying from an unnamed disease (most likely tuberculosis), and to comfort him his brother tells him the story of a wonderful place filled with adventure, where people go after they die. Shortly after, a fire breaks out, and Jonatan dies after throwing himself out the window with his brother in his arms. Two months later Karl dies, and meets his brother in the land of Nangijala, all traces of the illness gone. All is not well in the land, however, as the evil Tengil and his dragon Katla have enslaved the people of Törnrosdalen (Thornrose Valley), and the brothers along with the other occupants of Körsbärsdale (Cherry Valley) must free them.
The book was criticized for it's portrayal of death and the transmigration of souls, as well as for the ending, which you might understand once you read it.
Ronja Rövardotter (Ronia the Robber's Daughter)
by Astrid Lindgren
All her books are good, but these two have always been my favourites, along with Pippi Longstockings and Emil of Lönneberga (or Maple Hills). Lindgren had the amazing ability to write amazing heroines, independent girls who broke the rules as they pleased, and were every bit as "good" as the boys, closer to tomboy George than girly-girl Anne in Enid Blyton's Famous Five series. Anyway.
Ronja is the daughter of Mattis, the leader of a band of robbers, and grows up in one half of a castle in the woods. The castle has been split in two by lightning, and the other side is occupied by a rival band of robbers, led by Borka. Ronja meets and (eventually) befriends Birk, Borka's son, but cannot let her family know, as they would be furious. They continue to meet in secrecy and become "brother and sister" to one another, eventually leading to her father disowning her. Ronja and Birk run away and live in the forest, but her father repents and everything ends well. Aside from a little character death.
A Little Princess and The Secret Garden
by Frances Hodgson Burnett
Although sentimental to the point of soppiness, these were my favourites as a child. I really can't explain it. Just reading the synopsis makes me all weepy.
Children of Chaos ( or Playing the Future: What We Can Learn From Digital Kids )
by Douglas Rushkoff
The latter title says it all, really. The book discusses how to survive the technological age, the need to adapt, and the merits of Generation X as opposed to the Baby Boomers who spawned it. The six chapters are;
The fall of linear thinking and the rise of chaos,
The fall of duality and the rise of holism,
The fall of mechanism and the rise of animism,
The fall of gravity andthe rise of consensual hallucination,
The fall of metaphor and the rise of recapitulation,
and
The fall of god and the rise of nature.
Rubyfruit Jungle
by Rita Mae Brown
A coming-of-age novel about lesbian (or bisexual) Molly Bolt, one of the greatest heroines of the 20th century. There is really nothing more to say, except that this was one of the books that truly inspired me to travel, write and have fabulous sex.
Felidae
by Akif Pirinçci
A truly wonderful crime novel, told from the viewpoint of Francis the cat. Apparently there are sequels, but as I only learned this about twenty seconds ago, I haven't read them. In this book Pirinçci masterfully merges contemporary crime fiction with ethics and philosophy, creating a thrilling story that, unlike many detective novels, loses none of it's qualities even after extensive re-reading.
Good Omens
by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
I love both writers, and this collaboration is nothing short of miraculous. It tells the story of Aziraphale the angel ad Crowley the demon, who try to stop the coming of the Anti-Christ, since they've taken a shine to humanity in general. Other characters include the Four Bikers of the Apocalypse, Anathema Device - descendant of Agnes Nutter, the only truly accurate prophet to have ever lived, and Adam Young, the 11-year-old Anti-Christ.
Well, I'm sure I could go on like this, but I need to eat.
Here's a list of books that have influenced me in some way. In no particular order;
Zero Girl
by Sam Kieth
A comic book about high-school student Amy Smooter, who crushes on her guidance councellor, oozes blue goo from her feet when she feels shame, is protected by circles and attacked by squares, and saves the world. This book, recommended to me by a guidance-councellor-type-figure I had a terrible (and obvious) crush on, was the center of my world for a few months. The reason? Well, as Mr. Crush recommended it, he said it reminded him of me. I've often wondered if that was his idea of a cruel joke, since it caused me to read the book in record time, re-read it a few hundred times, and endlessly wallow over what he could possibly have meant. You'll forgive me my teenage angst if you read it.
Oh, and I occasionally use Zerogirl as an internet handle, and those eyes in my avatar are taken from the cover. Maybe it's time to let go...oh heck, I'll give it another seven years.
The Sexual State of the Union
by Susie Bright
I suppose you could say this is a study in cultural anthropology, or rather sexual anthropology, if there even is such a thing. I like this book so much, I may have...er...stolen it...from the library. But that's neither here nor there. My copy is now so battered, the library probably wouldn't take it back anyway. I've highlighted several passages, travelled to Denmark with it, accidentally spilled beer over it, and possibly used it to press leaves...from an illegal plant. This, however, says absolutely nothing about the book, so you'll just have to read it. I will include a short passage;
What is UP with sex lives of the people who love to say NO? Does the God Squad ever entertain impure thoughts? And if they do, how does it affect their politics?
The irony of questioning a conservative's sex life is that so many people think it's too damn rude to ask, while the crusading right wing makes it a point of principle to ask about everyone else's sex lives. Are you now or have you ever been a homosexual? Do you practice sodomy in the privacy of your own home? How old were you when you first had sex? How many people have you slept with? Which ones did you only lust after? Did you practice chastity as a teenager? Do you touch yourself in forbidden places? Why don't you have any children?
Bröderna Lejonhjärta (The Brothers Lionheart)
by Astrid Lindgren
The only book ever to come even close to making me believe in life after death, simply because it sounded like so much fun. If you're not familiar with this book, I'll give you the gist of the plot now:
The Brothers of the story are Karl and Jonatan Lejon (or Lion in the translation), 10 and 13 years old respectively. Karl is dying from an unnamed disease (most likely tuberculosis), and to comfort him his brother tells him the story of a wonderful place filled with adventure, where people go after they die. Shortly after, a fire breaks out, and Jonatan dies after throwing himself out the window with his brother in his arms. Two months later Karl dies, and meets his brother in the land of Nangijala, all traces of the illness gone. All is not well in the land, however, as the evil Tengil and his dragon Katla have enslaved the people of Törnrosdalen (Thornrose Valley), and the brothers along with the other occupants of Körsbärsdale (Cherry Valley) must free them.
The book was criticized for it's portrayal of death and the transmigration of souls, as well as for the ending, which you might understand once you read it.
Ronja Rövardotter (Ronia the Robber's Daughter)
by Astrid Lindgren
All her books are good, but these two have always been my favourites, along with Pippi Longstockings and Emil of Lönneberga (or Maple Hills). Lindgren had the amazing ability to write amazing heroines, independent girls who broke the rules as they pleased, and were every bit as "good" as the boys, closer to tomboy George than girly-girl Anne in Enid Blyton's Famous Five series. Anyway.
Ronja is the daughter of Mattis, the leader of a band of robbers, and grows up in one half of a castle in the woods. The castle has been split in two by lightning, and the other side is occupied by a rival band of robbers, led by Borka. Ronja meets and (eventually) befriends Birk, Borka's son, but cannot let her family know, as they would be furious. They continue to meet in secrecy and become "brother and sister" to one another, eventually leading to her father disowning her. Ronja and Birk run away and live in the forest, but her father repents and everything ends well. Aside from a little character death.
A Little Princess and The Secret Garden
by Frances Hodgson Burnett
Although sentimental to the point of soppiness, these were my favourites as a child. I really can't explain it. Just reading the synopsis makes me all weepy.
Children of Chaos ( or Playing the Future: What We Can Learn From Digital Kids )
by Douglas Rushkoff
The latter title says it all, really. The book discusses how to survive the technological age, the need to adapt, and the merits of Generation X as opposed to the Baby Boomers who spawned it. The six chapters are;
The fall of linear thinking and the rise of chaos,
The fall of duality and the rise of holism,
The fall of mechanism and the rise of animism,
The fall of gravity andthe rise of consensual hallucination,
The fall of metaphor and the rise of recapitulation,
and
The fall of god and the rise of nature.
Rubyfruit Jungle
by Rita Mae Brown
A coming-of-age novel about lesbian (or bisexual) Molly Bolt, one of the greatest heroines of the 20th century. There is really nothing more to say, except that this was one of the books that truly inspired me to travel, write and have fabulous sex.
Felidae
by Akif Pirinçci
A truly wonderful crime novel, told from the viewpoint of Francis the cat. Apparently there are sequels, but as I only learned this about twenty seconds ago, I haven't read them. In this book Pirinçci masterfully merges contemporary crime fiction with ethics and philosophy, creating a thrilling story that, unlike many detective novels, loses none of it's qualities even after extensive re-reading.
Good Omens
by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
I love both writers, and this collaboration is nothing short of miraculous. It tells the story of Aziraphale the angel ad Crowley the demon, who try to stop the coming of the Anti-Christ, since they've taken a shine to humanity in general. Other characters include the Four Bikers of the Apocalypse, Anathema Device - descendant of Agnes Nutter, the only truly accurate prophet to have ever lived, and Adam Young, the 11-year-old Anti-Christ.
Well, I'm sure I could go on like this, but I need to eat.
June 9th, 2007
Ok, so I forgot a few. Fine... Here are some more (like anyone cares):
And I do realize that some of them may not be "actors", per se...
Bill Pullman
Claim to fame: Lone Starr, President of the USA in ID4, and my personal favourite: Daryl Zero in The Zero Effect. Which co-starred...
Ben Stiller
Claim to fame: Zoolander, Ted Stroehmann, Jerry Stahl, Mr. Furious, Rabbi Jake Schram, Greg Focker, Crazy Screaming Guy on Friends, a bunch of less-than-memorable characters in less-than-great films, and -again a personal favourite- Tony Perkis in Heavyweights.
Jeff Goldblum
Claim to fame: I can't believe I left him out. I'm so sorry. "Slick" Calvin Stanhope, Dexter King, Dr. Ian Malcolm, D.H. Banes...I'm not going to mention The Fly, because I have certain...issues with people turning into monstrous half-insects. But maybe that's just me.
Sam Neill
Claim to fame: Dr. Alan Grant, Malloy (the Springfield Cat Burglar), John Trent, Dr. Weir, et.c.
Jon Stewart
Claim to fame: Getting Americans interested in the world outside the US (and possibly Canada). And Marion Frank Stokes in Death to Smoochy, starring...
Robin Williams
Claim to fame: T.S. Garp, Adrian Cronauer, John Keating (Oh captain, my captain!), Peter Pan(...oops, Banning), Alan Parrish, Patch Adams, Rainbow Randolph, Sean Maguire.
Bill Maher
Claim to fame: Helping Jon Stewart get Americans interested in something other than MTV and the WWF. Although I'll never, ever forgive him for not smothering Ann Coulter with a pillow when he had the chance.
Craig Bierko
Claim to fame: Jeffrey Coho. Having Denise end up with Brad-the-fucking-republican-ass is just...wrong.
Gene Wilder
Claim to fame: *Sigh* He's over 70, and I'd still do him. Willy Wonka (the good one, not the Johnny Depp one), Leo Bloom, Dr. Doug Ross (wait a minute...did ER writers have a sense of humour?), The Waco Kid, Dr. Frederick Fronkensteen, Skip Donahue, Dave Lyons.
Mark Steel
Claim to fame: Getting people interested in history, politics and religion. I love him. Not only would I do him, I'd overthrow the government with him and establish a communist utopia that would go down the crapper in a few months.
Rob Brydon
Claim to fame: Roman De Vere. And numerous appearances as himself.
John Hannah
Claim to fame: I really can't believe I forgot John Hannah! Hopefully he'll punish me for this if I ever meet him. Matthew in Four Weddings & a Funeral (the funeral still makes me cry), James Hammerton from Sliding Doors ("Remember what the Monty Python boys say..."), Jonathan Carnahan from the otherwise unspectacular Mummy and it's sequel, Dr. Robert Dalgety from the short-lived but brilliant MDs, Doug from I'm with Lucy, and as the eponymous hero of Rebus.
Peter Krause
Claim to fame: Nate Fisher of Six Feet Under. 'Nuff said.
Malcolm Gets
Claim to fame: Richard Karinsky from Caroline in the City, co-starring...
Eric Lutes
Claim to fame: Caroline in the City's Del.
James Caan
Claim to fame: Sonny Corleone, Ed Deline.
Johnny Depp
Claim to fame: Doesn't every list have to include him? Personally I think it goes without saying, but, here goes. Cry-Baby Walker, Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Raoul Duke, Ichabod Crane, Roux, Captain Jack, Rochester, and pretty much anything else he may have ever so much as breathed near, except Vanessa Paradis, who annoys the crap out of me.
Richard E. Grant
Claim to fame: Withnail, Simon Marchmont, Cort Romney.
Jeremy Piven
Claim to fame: Spence from Ellen, Ari Gold, Paul Spericki in Grosse Pointe Blank.
John C. McGinley
Claim to fame: This is yet another oh-my-gosh-I-can't-believe-I-left-him-ou
William Fichtner
Claim to fame: Ryan Sparks from Grace under Fire, Dr. Bruce Kellerman from MDs, Jürgen from Equilibrium.
Willem Dafoe
Claim to fame: Christ himself, Paul Smecker (Oh, how I love Boondock Saints), Kimball in American Psycho, Norman Osborne, John Carpenter in Auto Focus. *Drool*
Billy Connolly
Claim to fame: The world's most fantastic Scottish accent, Beautiful Joe, Kingdom Swann, Steve Myers, Uncle Monty, Professor Johnston.
Dylan McDermott
Claim to fame: Charles Newman in Three to Tango (and what a crap film that was), Bobby Donnell, John Stark.
Brad Garrett
Claim to fame: (Don't judge me, it just happened) Robert Barone.
Kris Kristofferson
Claim to fame: Brilliant lyricist and composer, 71 and still friggin' hot, Billy the Kid, John Norman Howard, Jesse James, Sheriff Charlie Wade, Whistler. And he can sing, too!
Thomas Cavanagh
Claim to fame: Tom Farrell in the (sadly) cancelled Love Monkey, Ed, Dan Dorian, Doug from Providence.
Crispin Glover
Claim to fame: George McFly, Willard, Creepy Thin Guy, Andy Warhol.
Robert Downey Jr.
Claim to fame: Ralph from 1969, Charlie Chaplin, Larry Pal, Harry Lockhart.
Eddie Izzard
Claim to fame: Wow. He'll never forgive me. I've, like, touched him and everything. Being an Executive Transvestite, Tony P. in Mystery Men, Troy in Circus, Von Wangenheim in Shadow of the Vampire, Noma Nagel in Ocean's Twelve and Thirteen.
Ok. I'll stop now. I may be insane. Or I may just be really bored. I'll leave it to you, dear non-existent reader, to decide.
And I do realize that some of them may not be "actors", per se...
Bill Pullman
Claim to fame: Lone Starr, President of the USA in ID4, and my personal favourite: Daryl Zero in The Zero Effect. Which co-starred...
Ben Stiller
Claim to fame: Zoolander, Ted Stroehmann, Jerry Stahl, Mr. Furious, Rabbi Jake Schram, Greg Focker, Crazy Screaming Guy on Friends, a bunch of less-than-memorable characters in less-than-great films, and -again a personal favourite- Tony Perkis in Heavyweights.
Jeff Goldblum
Claim to fame: I can't believe I left him out. I'm so sorry. "Slick" Calvin Stanhope, Dexter King, Dr. Ian Malcolm, D.H. Banes...I'm not going to mention The Fly, because I have certain...issues with people turning into monstrous half-insects. But maybe that's just me.
Sam Neill
Claim to fame: Dr. Alan Grant, Malloy (the Springfield Cat Burglar), John Trent, Dr. Weir, et.c.
Jon Stewart
Claim to fame: Getting Americans interested in the world outside the US (and possibly Canada). And Marion Frank Stokes in Death to Smoochy, starring...
Robin Williams
Claim to fame: T.S. Garp, Adrian Cronauer, John Keating (Oh captain, my captain!), Peter Pan(...oops, Banning), Alan Parrish, Patch Adams, Rainbow Randolph, Sean Maguire.
Bill Maher
Claim to fame: Helping Jon Stewart get Americans interested in something other than MTV and the WWF. Although I'll never, ever forgive him for not smothering Ann Coulter with a pillow when he had the chance.
Craig Bierko
Claim to fame: Jeffrey Coho. Having Denise end up with Brad-the-fucking-republican-ass is just...wrong.
Gene Wilder
Claim to fame: *Sigh* He's over 70, and I'd still do him. Willy Wonka (the good one, not the Johnny Depp one), Leo Bloom, Dr. Doug Ross (wait a minute...did ER writers have a sense of humour?), The Waco Kid, Dr. Frederick Fronkensteen, Skip Donahue, Dave Lyons.
Mark Steel
Claim to fame: Getting people interested in history, politics and religion. I love him. Not only would I do him, I'd overthrow the government with him and establish a communist utopia that would go down the crapper in a few months.
Rob Brydon
Claim to fame: Roman De Vere. And numerous appearances as himself.
John Hannah
Claim to fame: I really can't believe I forgot John Hannah! Hopefully he'll punish me for this if I ever meet him. Matthew in Four Weddings & a Funeral (the funeral still makes me cry), James Hammerton from Sliding Doors ("Remember what the Monty Python boys say..."), Jonathan Carnahan from the otherwise unspectacular Mummy and it's sequel, Dr. Robert Dalgety from the short-lived but brilliant MDs, Doug from I'm with Lucy, and as the eponymous hero of Rebus.
Peter Krause
Claim to fame: Nate Fisher of Six Feet Under. 'Nuff said.
Malcolm Gets
Claim to fame: Richard Karinsky from Caroline in the City, co-starring...
Eric Lutes
Claim to fame: Caroline in the City's Del.
James Caan
Claim to fame: Sonny Corleone, Ed Deline.
Johnny Depp
Claim to fame: Doesn't every list have to include him? Personally I think it goes without saying, but, here goes. Cry-Baby Walker, Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, Raoul Duke, Ichabod Crane, Roux, Captain Jack, Rochester, and pretty much anything else he may have ever so much as breathed near, except Vanessa Paradis, who annoys the crap out of me.
Richard E. Grant
Claim to fame: Withnail, Simon Marchmont, Cort Romney.
Jeremy Piven
Claim to fame: Spence from Ellen, Ari Gold, Paul Spericki in Grosse Pointe Blank.
John C. McGinley
Claim to fame: This is yet another oh-my-gosh-I-can't-believe-I-left-him-ou
William Fichtner
Claim to fame: Ryan Sparks from Grace under Fire, Dr. Bruce Kellerman from MDs, Jürgen from Equilibrium.
Willem Dafoe
Claim to fame: Christ himself, Paul Smecker (Oh, how I love Boondock Saints), Kimball in American Psycho, Norman Osborne, John Carpenter in Auto Focus. *Drool*
Billy Connolly
Claim to fame: The world's most fantastic Scottish accent, Beautiful Joe, Kingdom Swann, Steve Myers, Uncle Monty, Professor Johnston.
Dylan McDermott
Claim to fame: Charles Newman in Three to Tango (and what a crap film that was), Bobby Donnell, John Stark.
Brad Garrett
Claim to fame: (Don't judge me, it just happened) Robert Barone.
Kris Kristofferson
Claim to fame: Brilliant lyricist and composer, 71 and still friggin' hot, Billy the Kid, John Norman Howard, Jesse James, Sheriff Charlie Wade, Whistler. And he can sing, too!
Thomas Cavanagh
Claim to fame: Tom Farrell in the (sadly) cancelled Love Monkey, Ed, Dan Dorian, Doug from Providence.
Crispin Glover
Claim to fame: George McFly, Willard, Creepy Thin Guy, Andy Warhol.
Robert Downey Jr.
Claim to fame: Ralph from 1969, Charlie Chaplin, Larry Pal, Harry Lockhart.
Eddie Izzard
Claim to fame: Wow. He'll never forgive me. I've, like, touched him and everything. Being an Executive Transvestite, Tony P. in Mystery Men, Troy in Circus, Von Wangenheim in Shadow of the Vampire, Noma Nagel in Ocean's Twelve and Thirteen.
Ok. I'll stop now. I may be insane. Or I may just be really bored. I'll leave it to you, dear non-existent reader, to decide.
you decideJune 8th, 2007
A list of the world's sexiest men. Yay. (Blame it on Brain, not me)
At first it was "over 45", then "older", and now it's just...well..a list. But they're all over 40.
In no particular order;
James Spader
Claim to fame: Alan Shore. Everything he does makes me go squishy.
George Clooney
Claim to fame: Jim Byrd in Confessions of a Dangerous Mind. That 'stache totally did it for me.
Dustin Hoffman
Claim to fame: He inspired Brain to write this stupid list in the first place!
...besides, I had a crush on Captain Hook as a kid.
Alan Rickman
Claim to fame: Duh. Snape? Harry-the-mid-life-crisis-guy from Love, Actually? Phil-the-grouchy-hairdresser from Blow Dry? Metatron (despite the lack of genitalia)? Rasputin (Russia's greatest love machine)? Colonel Brandon? The Sheriff from Prince of Thieves? Uber-villain Hans Gruber? I swear he picks these roles just to torture me.
Steve Buscemi
Claim to fame: Ghost World. I have a geek fetish...so sue me!
Liam Neeson
Claim to fame: The man managed to make a thinly veiled Jesus-allegory sound sexy! That takes skill! Not to mention Daniel in Love, Actually. And that accent...
Ralph Fiennes
Claim to fame: He managed to make sadistic Nazi bastard Amon Goeth look sexy. If Hitler had looked like that...I'm just saying history might have turned out a bit different.
Mikhail Baryshnikov
Claim to fame: Alexandr Petrovsky. So he's a temperamental artist. So he slapped her. Bitch only cares about her fucking shoes anyway.
William Petersen
Claim to fame: Gil Grissom. Need I say more?
John Slattery
Claim to fame: Victor Lang, Bill Kelley, Michael Cassidy, Sam Truman. Always a love interest, never the one.
Hugh Laurie
Claim to fame: Dr. House. And Prince Ludwig. "I shall vreak my revengey!" And just being generally...Hugh-ish.
Peter Gallagher
Claim to fame: Sandy Cohen, Buddy Kane. And those fantastic eyebrows!
Alec Baldwin
Claim to fame: Leonardo Leonardo! And the video where he tore his kid a new one. And SNL. "I love you, canteen boy!"
Anthony Head
Claim to fame: Why can't Tony look as hot as Michael? And let's not forget Giles.
Jack Coleman
Claim to fame: Mr. Bennett of Heroes. Oh, you know you want him too.
Adrian Pasdar
Claim to fame: Sticking to Heroes: Nathan Petrelli. And ADA McClaren on Judging Amy. And David Bradley on Desperate Housewives. And he shares the Best Eyebrows Award with Peter Gallagher. What is it with Brain and eyebrows?
Tom Selleck
Claim to fame: Weeeell...Dr. Burke. But also Peter Malloy, Peter Mitchell and Magnum, P.I.
Isaiah Washington
Claim to fame: The other Dr. Burke. And some sort of homophobic remark. I dunno.
Patrick Dempsey
Claim to fame: Speaking of Grey's anatomy...he's just so...so...so...[Brain shuts down] *drool*
Kevin Spacey
Claim to fame: Shall we do this in chronological order? Eddie Otis, Buddy Ackerman, Verbal Kint, John Doe, Jim Williams, Lester Burnham, Michael Lynch, Eugene Simonet, David Gale, Bobby Darin and Lex Luthor!
Scott Bakula
Claim to fame: I've had a crush on him since Quantum Leap, so I'm willing to forgive him for Archer.
Kevin Kline
Claim to fame: Paden from Silverado. Otto from A fish called Wanda. Richard Parker from Consenting Adults. Luc Teyssier from French Kiss (don't mind if I do!). Vince McCain from Fierce Creatures.
Alan Cumming
Claim to fame: Being deliciously sexually ambiguous. And then there's Boris Grishenko, the only reason -ever- to watch the craptacular GoldenEye. And geekazoid Sandy Frink with his big folder in Romy and Michele's High School Reunion. And Saturninus in Titus. And a super-gay General Batista in Company Man. And Fegan Floop, the only real reason to watch all three Spy Kids movies. And albino bad guy Wyatt Frame in Josie and The Pussycats. And -last but not least - Joe Therrian in his very own Anniversary Party. Seeing Alan dance around with a hundred little pigtails is enough to make anyone squishy.
Judd Nelson
Claim to fame: John Bender. Bad guys are the best. Although the was pretty hot as Jack on Suddenly Susan.
Joshua Cox
Claim to fame: Helloooo, nurse! Er...midwife. Peter Riggs on Strong Medicine. *Mmmmm*
Tony Shalhoub
Claim to fame: Monk. And Ian Stark. Does anybody remember that show?
Christopher Walken
Claim to fame: You need to ask? He's...I...you know...just...he's always...the way he talks...it's, it's...it's crazy!
David Duchovny
Claim to fame: Foxy Fox Mulder of course, but he was pretty good as Ira Kane in crap-fest Evolution, and as hand model J.P. Prewitt in Zoolander.
Dermot Mulroney
Claim to fame: The best friend in My Best Friend's Wedding and pain-in-the-butt Gavin on Friends.
Tim Matheson
Claim to fame: VP Hoynes on The West Wing, Otter Stratton in Animal House, and the impostor in A Very Brady Sequel.
David Hyde Pierce
Claim to fame: Being gay. Other than that; Niles Crane, and nervous wreck Peter MacMannus in Down with Love.
John Corbett
Claim to fame: Aidan on Sex & the City, and the non-Greek in My Big Fat Greek Wedding.
David Eigenberg
Claim to fame: Steve on Sex & the City. Steve was sexy.
Kyle MacLachlan
Claim to fame: Why, Dale Cooper of Twin Peaks, Trey on Sex & the City, and creepy-ass Orson Hodge on Desperate Housewives.
Gary Oldman
Claim to fame: Lee Harvey Oswald, Dracula, Beethoven, Zorg, the incredibly unsexy Mason Verger, O.W. Grant in Interstate 60, Lynch in Dead Fish, and the adorable Snuffles, a.k.a. Sirius Black.
Jason Isaacs
Claim to fame: Lucius Malfoy. The yummiest Death Eater there ever was. Apart from Snape, but he's good now (yesheisyesheisyesheis!).
Craig Ferguson
Claim to fame: Nigel Wick. Yummy English accent, too!
Rowan Atkinson
Claim to fame: Ignore the monstrosity that is Bean, and focus on Mondavarius, Pollini, and the genius of Blackadder.
Rik Mayall
Claim to fame: Drop Dead Fred, Lord Flashheart, Rick of The Young Ones and King Herod in the 2000 TV version of Jesus Christ Superstar.
Alan Davies
Claim to fame: Thlight lithp. Jonathan Creek, default loser on QI.
Steve Coogan
Claim to fame: Professional pain-in-the-butt Alan Partridge, Phileas Fogg.
Alfred Molina
Claim to fame: Snidely K. Whiplash, Comte Paul de Reynaud in Chocolat, Doc Ock.
John Cusack
Claim to fame: Martin Q. Blank, Rob Gordon, Craig Schwartz, Jonathan Trager.
Hugh Grant
Claim to fame: I know, I know...but he's adorable, and you know it! The Prime Minister in Love Actually, Will in About a Boy, William Thacker in Notting Hill, Daniel Cleaver in Bridget Jones' Diary...
Colin Firth
Claim to fame: Mr. Darcy in Bridget Jones' Diary and Pride & Prejudice.
Stephen Fry
Claim to fame: Apparently the second most influential gay man in the world, and damn smexy to boot. Watch QI if you don't believe me.
Geoffrey Rush
Claim to fame: Harry Plummer, Leon Trotsky, Casanova Frankenstein, Inspector Javert.
Robert Carlyle
Claim to fame: The Full Monty, Danny Devine in Dead Fish, Felix DeSouza in The 51st State. Oh, and Hitler.
Hugo Weaving
Claim to fame: V, Agent Smith, Elrond, Tick.
Terence Stamp
Claim to fame: "Ralph" in Pricilla, Queen of the Desert, Jor-El in Smallville, and - of course - General Zod! "Kneel before Zod! Zod!" Don't mind if I do! Also, it takes something special to be this hot at 68.
I could probably keep going all night (ooooh, fresh!), but I think I'll stop now. My fingers are tired....oh, get your mind out of the gutter! There isn't room for both of ours.
hornyNúna heldur þetta fífl fram að vinur hans hafi verið að djóka. Ofsa fyndið haha. Er hægt að kæra fólk fyrir lélegan húmor?
annoyedJune 6th, 2007
Ekki skipta við fyrirtækið
Garðlíf!
Ég réði mig í vinnu hjá þessu svokallaða fyrirtæki, og starfaði þar í tvo daga, nánar tiltekið 21. maí og 24. maí, samtals í 9 1/2 tíma. Umsamin laun voru 700 krónur á tímann, svart. Eftir þessa tvo daga var störfum mínum í raun lokið, þó ég hafi ekki fengið vitneskju um það fyrr en nokkru síðar. Í millitíðinni sendi yfirmaðurinn mér sms þar sem mér var ýmist tilkynnt að vinna væri daginn eftir, eða að engin vinna væri.
Síðan fór ég að reyna að fá greitt. Svörin sem ég fék voru margskonar;
Þú færð borgað...
...í næstu viku
...á morgun.
...ég læt X koma þeim til þín.
Loks hætti yfirmaðurinn að svara í símann.
Þegar ég ræddi vð X í gær, tjáði hún mér að lögreglan hefði komið og spurt um yfirmanninn, sem síðan skipaði henni að segja að verkefnið sem þá var í gangi væri það fyrsta.
Í dag hringdi ég síðan í númer yfirmannsins, og eftir þónokkrar tilraunir var ansað. Náunginn sem svaraði sagðist heita "Ólafur Tryggvason", og vera gjaldkeri. Eftir að ég skýrði aðstæður fyrir honum, sagði hann yfirmanninn vera farinn í frí, og að hann gæti ekki tekið eingöngu mín orð fyrir þessu. Þegar ég svo minntist á að X hefði heldur ekki fengið greitt, þverneitaði hann, sagðist vera nýbúinn að tala við hana, og að hún væri búin að fá sín laun og væri bara mjög ánægð. Hann sagðist síðan ætla að leggja launin inn um mánaðamótin. Ég sagðist ekki verða á landinu þá, og þá spurði hann hvað ég væri að fara að gera til útlanda. Ég sagðist bara vera að fara í frí. Hann sagðist þá geta lagt launin inn fimmtánda júní. Ég endurtók að ég vildi fá greitt, því mig vantaði peninga núna, en hann sagðist ætla að athuga málið, en þó ekki fyrr en hann hafði bent mér á að þetta væru "svo litlir peningar" að ég hefði "ekkert að gera við þá".
Ég hringdi í X og sagði henni frá þess. Hrakti hún undir eins allt sem maðurinn hafði sagt, en á meða ég ræddi við hana hringdi hann aftur. Hann var ekki eins kurteis í þetta skiptið.
Nú sagði hann ýmist að ég væri búin að fá borgað, að ég hefði tekið of langar kaffipásur, að ég hefði unnið illa, og að ég væri spilafíkill og dópisti. Þetta sagðist hann hafa eftir X.Þegar ég benti honum á að yfirmaðurinn gæti ekki hafa lagt inn hjá mér, því hann hefði aldrei fengið reikningsnúmer hjá mér, sagði hann að Tryggingastofnun hefði látið hann hafa það, og "ráðlagt honum að leggja inn".
Hann bauðst til að greiða mér 2000 krónur, eða þessar 6650 sem ég á inni -ef ég mætti í vinnu á morgun. Ég neitaði því að sjálfsögðu, og endurtók að ég vildi fá launin. Í bakgrunninum mátti heyra í öskrandi börnum, og hann sagðist þurfa að fara "að lemja þessa helvítis krakka". Ég leiddi það hjá mér, og endurtók kröfuna enn einu sinni. Hann sakaði mig þá um að vera með dónaskap, og sagði að ég skyldi passa mig, því hann gæti hvenær sem er "kippt fótunum undan mér". Ég spurði hvað það ætti að þýða, en fékk ekkert svar. Hann sagði síðan að hann gæti lamið mig rétt eins og konuna, og ég spurði hvort ég ætti að hringja í kvennaathvarfið fyrir hana. Hann svaraði því til að hún væri "löngu búin að læra að það þýðir ekkert", og sagði svo að hann gæti bara "lamið hausunum á [okkur] saman". Um þetta leyti var ég skjálfandi af reiði, og skellti á.
Og til að endurtaka þetta:
Ekki skipta við Garðlíf!
furiousJune 2nd, 2007
This was taken through some coloured & textured glass I bumped into downtown. I qite like the fact that Mother Teresa decided to make an appearance. Would have been funnier on a piece of toast, though...
June 1st, 2007
Roskilde is sold out. I don't have a ticket. Therefore I must commit suicide by drinking myself to death. Goodbye.
suicidalMay 30th, 2007
Dear Customer;
Thank you for downloading Icelandic Mentality™ 2.0 (beta). We appreciate your support. If you are not 100% satisfied with our product, you can always quietly grumble to yourself whilst trying to figure out how to escape from the mental hospital you'll undoubtedly find yourself in within 6-8 weeks. Remember that by downloading Icelandic Mentality™ 2.0 (beta), you are entitled to 50% off our fine companion-products, including Work-A-Holic™ 1.2, UlcerMaster™ (version 6.0 out NOW!) and Seasonal Affective Disorder™ 3.4, which now comes with Excessive Drinking™ and our all-time bestseller, the SuiCider™ built in at no extra cost to you!
Please take a look at our range of roleplaying games, including the challenging Surviving through Retirement™, the hilarious PaycheckBuster™, and the ever-popular Grocery-shopping on a Budget™!
Please note that production of the Social Amenities™ line will soon end, so as of the end of the year support for BuSystem™ (v. 1.0 - 4.7), SocialSecurity™ (v. 1.0 - 3.6 beta), The Humane Conditions Game™ (v. 1.0 beta) and Will 2 Live™ (1.0 - 9.0 LE) will not be available. We thank you for using the Social Amenities™ line, and remind you that you can still access support and updated versions in other countries. We suggest Sweden.
With regards,
E.R.J.A. Schrödinger
Head of Marketing,
Kitty-In-A-Box Productions HF.
creativeMay 22nd, 2007
Sometimes my brain gets the strangest ideas. Right now I caught it thinking about which of the Queer Eye guys it would date. "Moot!" I screamed at it "They're all gay! Duh! Even if they weren't, you're not actually fantasizing about celebrities, I forbid it." But Brain took no heed. It mused over the merits of Thom and Carson, with a little side-thought about Jai (before realizing he looks fifteen, although he is 27), and after way too long, reached a somewhat strange conclusion. It would date either Kyan or Ted, the "straightest" of the fab five, odd, considering that it usually goes for the gayest of the straight ones. Mabey it's just looking for a middle ground. It gave me the reasons for this choice, revealing that it thought Kyan was "abso-fucking-lutely fucking gorgeous enough to fuck" (Brain's words - not mine) and that something about Ted's dry wit and serious demeanor turned it on - on an intellectual level (a Brain should know). This led to a rather one-sided discussion in which Brain tried to sort through my crushes, past and present, before coming to the logical conclusion that I must be insane. I kind of knew that already.
weirdMay 11th, 2007
Now, my imaginary reader, I know you must be tiring of my rants (how sad is it that even in my imagination people hate me?) so I'll make this one short [read; long and filled with inappropriate humour]
I have about fifty days to plan the trip. That sucks. Sucks so much. I wish I only had three days. I haven't even bought my Roskilde ticket yet, and they say they'll probably be sold out sometime in may or early june. And I'm already broke. At least there's still the pre-party tonight, and since there's a raffle, keep your hypothetical fingers crossed (well, you are figments of my imagination, so I think you have fingers. You might just have really long, flexible tongues. Hmmm...) Anyway. Where was I? Oh yes. I suck. Yesterday was a disaster, but thankfully the kind of disaster you can just drink away. I went to Austurvöllur, the closest this city has to a park. (Well, we kind of have parks, but this is where people gather on sunny days.) I'd bought some beers, so I sat down to drink them like a common bum. So far so good. Then some idiots sitting by the cafe start throwing shotglasses in the direction of...er...my HEAD! Fuckin' eejits! Glasses smash, I'm fine, yaddayadda. Then my cousin wanders by, so I wave him over, and he sits down. No problem there. But then he lights a cigarette, smokes it for a while, and then puts it out. On the wall against which I am sitting. The ember (what do you call it anyway - you understand what I mean. The little glowy thing on the tip. Where the fire is. Quite essential to the whole process really.) falls into my pants. Yes. My pants. I, being an eejit, don't immediately realize this, until my cousin says something along the lines of "Ooh, it went out." I - in the fine tradition of a comedy straightman gawk at him awhile before sliding along the pavement to put out my assfire. That accomplished, my cousin departs, satisfied that he's wreaked the usual havoc, and I settle down to read my book ("Neither here nor there" by Bill Bryson, possibly one of the funniest men on the planet). however, this seems to annoy the severely inebriated man next to me, who proceeds to pester me with questions in at least three different languages. After a while he paused and said "You could just pat me on the shoulder and say; Sorry, but I want to read my book" And I did, but instead of fucking off, which would have been great, he asks me to keep an eye on his beer, and wanders off to harass a small child. An Icelandic child. In English. telling it to put things in the trash. Well. I buggered off soon after and made my way to Kaffi Vín (That's Café Vienna to you), where the Eurovision pre-thingy was on. Once there, I had one beer, then another, told really bad jokes ("The two worst things to come from Austria were Hitler and this years entry. Not neccesarily in that order."), and, well...got completely shitfaced. My bag had been sitting on the floor, quietly humming to itself, until some asshole stepped on it. What was in it, you ask? Well, my iPod, headphones, book, writybook, phone, pez, small things. Oh, and two cans of beer. One of which got stepped on. Guess what happened. Yes, it burst. Drenching my stuff. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. After a small outburst I cleaned my stuff off, settled back into drinking, and managed to totally psych out the waiter by coming on to him. It was funny.
I hitched a ride (well, technically two rides) home, and ranted to my poor couch-dwelling cousin about...stuff, I think. Something like that, anyway, before falling asleep. On the floor. Next to my cat.
I woke up this morning on said floor, no cats nearby, no glasses to be found, hangover present and making itself known by bouncing cheerfully around inside my head. Yay.
So, instead of crawling into bed to sleep (oh, sleep, wonderful sleep), I read some shassi-slash (if you have to ask, don't) and had breakfast. Lox on toast. Yum-my!
Now that I have ranted, I must away to purchase nicotine-stix and stuff of hangover-killing nature. Then, after that....SLEEP!
I have about fifty days to plan the trip. That sucks. Sucks so much. I wish I only had three days. I haven't even bought my Roskilde ticket yet, and they say they'll probably be sold out sometime in may or early june. And I'm already broke. At least there's still the pre-party tonight, and since there's a raffle, keep your hypothetical fingers crossed (well, you are figments of my imagination, so I think you have fingers. You might just have really long, flexible tongues. Hmmm...) Anyway. Where was I? Oh yes. I suck. Yesterday was a disaster, but thankfully the kind of disaster you can just drink away. I went to Austurvöllur, the closest this city has to a park. (Well, we kind of have parks, but this is where people gather on sunny days.) I'd bought some beers, so I sat down to drink them like a common bum. So far so good. Then some idiots sitting by the cafe start throwing shotglasses in the direction of...er...my HEAD! Fuckin' eejits! Glasses smash, I'm fine, yaddayadda. Then my cousin wanders by, so I wave him over, and he sits down. No problem there. But then he lights a cigarette, smokes it for a while, and then puts it out. On the wall against which I am sitting. The ember (what do you call it anyway - you understand what I mean. The little glowy thing on the tip. Where the fire is. Quite essential to the whole process really.) falls into my pants. Yes. My pants. I, being an eejit, don't immediately realize this, until my cousin says something along the lines of "Ooh, it went out." I - in the fine tradition of a comedy straightman gawk at him awhile before sliding along the pavement to put out my assfire. That accomplished, my cousin departs, satisfied that he's wreaked the usual havoc, and I settle down to read my book ("Neither here nor there" by Bill Bryson, possibly one of the funniest men on the planet). however, this seems to annoy the severely inebriated man next to me, who proceeds to pester me with questions in at least three different languages. After a while he paused and said "You could just pat me on the shoulder and say; Sorry, but I want to read my book" And I did, but instead of fucking off, which would have been great, he asks me to keep an eye on his beer, and wanders off to harass a small child. An Icelandic child. In English. telling it to put things in the trash. Well. I buggered off soon after and made my way to Kaffi Vín (That's Café Vienna to you), where the Eurovision pre-thingy was on. Once there, I had one beer, then another, told really bad jokes ("The two worst things to come from Austria were Hitler and this years entry. Not neccesarily in that order."), and, well...got completely shitfaced. My bag had been sitting on the floor, quietly humming to itself, until some asshole stepped on it. What was in it, you ask? Well, my iPod, headphones, book, writybook, phone, pez, small things. Oh, and two cans of beer. One of which got stepped on. Guess what happened. Yes, it burst. Drenching my stuff. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. After a small outburst I cleaned my stuff off, settled back into drinking, and managed to totally psych out the waiter by coming on to him. It was funny.
I hitched a ride (well, technically two rides) home, and ranted to my poor couch-dwelling cousin about...stuff, I think. Something like that, anyway, before falling asleep. On the floor. Next to my cat.
I woke up this morning on said floor, no cats nearby, no glasses to be found, hangover present and making itself known by bouncing cheerfully around inside my head. Yay.
So, instead of crawling into bed to sleep (oh, sleep, wonderful sleep), I read some shassi-slash (if you have to ask, don't) and had breakfast. Lox on toast. Yum-my!
Now that I have ranted, I must away to purchase nicotine-stix and stuff of hangover-killing nature. Then, after that....SLEEP!
April 24th, 2007
, you're now logged in!
Below you'll find your test result. After, continue on to your homescreen to discover what we're about.
| Dr. Gregory House 70% Eccentricity, 55% Confidence, 20% Kindness |
| Congratulations, you're the man himself, Dr. Gregory House! You're quite strange, and usually do your own thing regardless of what anyone else thinks. This is partially because a person with an ego as large as yours could not care less what anyone else thinks or feels about anything. Unless, of course, they're your patient and they're dying--but only if they're dying of something interesting! You're a definite asshole to most other people, but at least you know how to be one in style, with an awesome wit, comfortable sneakers, and a never ending variety of facial expressions. |
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My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
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| Link: The House, MD Personality Test written by freedomdegrees on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
April 23rd, 2007
From Google maps. Directions from New York to Berlin.
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20. Take exit 24 A-B-C on the left toward I-93 N/Concord NH/S Station/I-93 S/Quincy 0.4 mi
1 min
21. Merge onto Atlantic Ave 0.8 mi
3 mins
22. Turn right at Central St 0.1 mi
23. Turn right at Long Wharf 0.1 mi
24. Swim across the Atlantic Ocean 3,462 mi
29 days 0 hours
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20. Take exit 24 A-B-C on the left toward I-93 N/Concord NH/S Station/I-93 S/Quincy 0.4 mi
1 min
21. Merge onto Atlantic Ave 0.8 mi
3 mins
22. Turn right at Central St 0.1 mi
23. Turn right at Long Wharf 0.1 mi
24. Swim across the Atlantic Ocean 3,462 mi
29 days 0 hours
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amused